Voters across the country are gearing up for what just may be the most exciting and important False Dichotomy we’ve had in many decades. “It was really hard to decide who to vote for,” said Mrs.

Southern Manitoba’s most popular shopping centre in Gretna, Manitoba has gone to extreme lengths to get rid of the teens who’ve been loitering in the parking lot this spring. To address this problem, ...

Facing uncertain economic times and threats from the US, Ontario Premier Doug Ford, in a show of strength and solidarity, shut off power to a whole bunch of people who weren’t actually using it.

Area woman Carolyn Enns, 71, was sick and tired of all the wrath and judgement she received for attending a movie on occasion that she decided it was time she attended a film instead. “I can’t even ...

Locally made small-batch craft beer is becoming increasingly popular across North America, with microbreweries opening from Goshen to Winnipeg and every place in between. For Mennonites, most of whom ...

It may have been temporarily paused for now, but this week the White House announced a 87% reciprocal tariff on all penguins, including hockey superstar Sydney Crosby. “Yeah, well I guess this is what ...

Liberal leader Mark Carney has significantly hurt his chances in La Crete, Winkler, Aylmer this week after dropping out of the Plautdietsch leadership debate. “Meanwhile, I’ve been brushing up on my ...

For the first time in team history, the Winnipeg Jets have clinched first place in the General Conference. “It’s a very exciting time to be alive,” said Dave of Winnipeg MC. “I never thought we’d see ...

Retired cheesemaker Earl Froese, 71, got up bright and early this morning, not wanting to waste a single moment. “I’ve got a full day ahead of me,” said Froese. “There’s a lot of important puttering ...

Middle school music teacher Anne Martens has gone totally baroque this week attending concerts all over the city. “My mother always warned me this would happen if I didn’t watch out,” said Martens. “I ...

Alex Ovechkin is now on pace to shatter the only record that really matters – career points. And the 39-year-old intends to stick around long enough to do so. “I’ll be in my 60s by then, but at least ...

A security blunder has revealed a Harrisonburg-area Mennonite church’s plans to spread peace and love in their community. “I can’t say who sent it to me,” said journalist Andrew Unger. “All I know is ...